Planning is Futile

So this might just turn out to be just another self-loathing post, but somehow, the revelation of 2011, to date, has enabled me to arrive at but 1 conclusion.

Planning is Futile.

You know, as kids, how we are taught to plan plan plan, to think about the future and all that jazz? I remember when I was young, in primary school, the oh-so-familiar topic during composition writing was "What I want to be when I grow up".

It's such an adult thing to do, to get a child, barely 7 to think about the future, what they want to be, what they want to do. Even in university, I could hardly decide on what courses I wanted to take, much less on what I wanted to be when I "grew up".


It's uncanny, but reflecting back on my childhood, I remember telling people I wanted to be a washing machine only because it would evoke laughter, and throw off that serious subject. As if at that young age, I knew how judgmental other adults/people would be. (Yes, i was that smart a child). From experience, if I said that I wanted to be a doctor, or a lawyer, or anything to that effect, it would be met with nods of approval. But if I told them what I really knew, which was that I had no idea what I wanted to be and also, I really didn't care much about growing up -- I was a happy child, that would be met with an awkward silence, followed by an encouraging (yet pitiful) pat on my head, followed bu a quick change in conversation topic. Thus, my "washing machine" ambition normally evoked chain of guffaws, and it would be simply dismissed as a playful child who was too smart for her own good. This was good for me because mischievous children are always deemed smart. I liked that very much, being seen as smart yet non-committal to any profession at all.

We all have an inbuilt system of what Freud deemed as "Self Defence Mechanisms" since birth and I was exercising the right to mine. For Christ's sake, did you really know what you wanted to be at a tender age of 7? I was more concerned with playing with my Little Tikes toys or trying to peel of yesterday's Play Doh off my hands.

My point is that as I looked back on my life, I would NEVER have imagined I would be here today, who I am, what I am -- I guess things just panned out naturally and if you would have given me a million bucks then to bet that this would be the kind of life and person I'd be today, I wouldn't have accepted it for the world.

Life is way too unpredictable to PLAN.

I remember a quote "If you fail to plan, you plan to fail." I don't know who came up with it, though I like the ring it has. Like one of those sentences that would fit so nicely in the chorus of a song...

Everything that I have "planned" for my life to date has NOT panned out. Perhaps I am a bad planner, but the most important things in life (my life at least) have been totally unplanned. And even if I attempted to, nothing has turned out as planned. The happiest moment were surprises, sad ones were just as surprising. Everything so far that has been monumental has been a total surprise.

Certain things totally unplanned for, which are the cornerstone of my life

- Having an awesomely supporting family
- Bodytype (genetic makeup)
- Personality
- True Friends
- Boyfriends (and breakups!)
- Country of Birth

No one knows what the future brings, but planning causes disappointments, especially if you plan big. Reach for the stars, so if you fall, you land on the moon? haha. Go on and deceive yourself. That's just another defense mechanism that protects you when you fail.

LIVE FOR THE MOMENT.

*Update: A friend read my tweet about planning being futile and replied with Proverbs 16:9, which says "In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps."