Geek Goddess: dating

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10 Dating Tips

Just thinking these thoughts aloud based on my past experience in the past 2 months... well, yea kinda...

1) Never blow hot-cold
Yes it might excite us temporarily with the mystery that surrounds you, but after a while, we write you off. Tell her if you like her, instead of playing the silly old mind games. It's all about consistency.

2) Do not be calculative ("You owe me 56.55 for dinner and GST is 3.66")
Not saying that I've encountered this before (Thank God No...) but still something to think about.

3) Be reliable
When you make a promise to call or text, make sure you do it.

4) Talk about exes casually only (unless probed)
Sooo many dating sites say it's NOT OK to talk about exes. I, on the other hand, think it is OK, as long as you are over her and not moping over how she hurt you. In fact, if you don't know much about the girls this dude has dated, how would you know what kind of guy he is? i think a person's exes is a pretty good indication on what kind of relationship this person is looking for with you.

5) Laugh
If you're gonna be deadpan, you can be sure to put her to sleep.

6)Be Honest
Don't pretend to be someone you're not. It's not sustainable.

7) Don't insult/criticize her friends
If you aren't gonna be well liked by the people she likes, then it really ain't gonna work...

8) If she rejects you dates more than 3 times consecutively, move on.
If she is interested, she'll suggest an alternative date. Too many rejections should be a good hint that she won't see you as anything more than a friend.

9) Show concern
Yes, as trivial as it is, whether asking her how her day was... or anything to show you want to know more about her, it's the first step towards getting to know someone better

10) Pick up the phone and CALL (Texting doesn't count)
Technology is NOT your best friend. There's a limit to texting. If you really like her, call and talk! What's there to be afraid of? Worse come to worse, she'll just say she's busy (unlikely if she's interested)

Singapore succeeds at EVERYTHING - except DATING

Yes, it's sad but true. Singaporeans succeed at everything - except dating. Well, not that I had to mention it, but last week, the International Herald Tribune reported this on their Asian highlight. True or not? Well, read on for their argument...

Students at Singapore Polytechnic during a class intended by the government to help set off romance among young people. (Pic taken from The International Herald Tribune)

Well, apparently, as reported, students from Singapore Poly had a sort of "college mixer", to help the males and females interact to boost chances of them dating. They had assembled for the first class of "Love Relations for Life: A Journey of Romance, Love and Sexuality."

The course, which is in its second year at two polytechnic institutes, is the latest of many, mostly futile, campaigns by the government to get its citizens to mate and multiply. Its popularity last year has led to talk of expansion through the higher education system.

"We want to tell students: Don't wait until you have built up your career, SOMETIMES IT'S TOO LATE, ESPECIALLY FOR THE GIRLS"

Yu-Foo Yee Shoon, minister of state for community development, youth and sports, said at a news conference last month.

The courses are an extension of government matchmaking programs that try to address the twin challenges embodied in a falling birthrate: Too few people are having babies and too few of those who are belong to what Singapore considers the genetically desirable educated elite.

For 25 years, the mating rituals organized by the government - tea dances, wine tasting, cooking classes, cruises, screenings of romantic movies - have been among the country's least-successful social engineering programs.

Last year Singapore's fertility rate fell to a record

low of 1.24 children per woman!

"Some people say if you're a smart guy you should marry a smart woman who can help you with your finances and career," said Chan, whose agency is called Club2040 and who has worked under contract for the Social Development Unit.

eStee Thinks: Definitely, couples should complement each other, but having similar interests may not be the be all and end all of a successful relationship. It takes more work than that. I've seen people who complement each other break up down the road and also have seen couples who seem as different as 2 end of the spectrum last a long time as well. It's not cookie cutter!

Three 20-year-old graduates from last year's inaugural course at Singapore Polytechnic still seemed imbued more with "kiasu" than romance.

Despite everything their teachers had told them about multitasking work and love, none was in a relationship. And nothing they had heard in class seemed to have dented their stereotypes about the opposite sex.

"I'm not open to relationships in school. Boys in school are not my cup of tea. They are male chauvinist pigs. They're annoying and childish. And they won't give in to you. They're just not mature." said Wei Shan Koh, a former student who works as a teacher's aide.

eStee Thinks: Well Weishan, I honestly think you're childish too. I know we all talk about equality and all that but if you aren't able to respect a man or give a man the respect he deserves, then you won't go anywhere. As much as women claim to be equals, we have to accept that men can be better than us in certain areas and likewise. If you want to talk so much about chauvinism, then why don't you go enlist yourself into 2 years into the army then come back and act macho...

"I think girls' ideas are a bit childish, or you might say girlie. It's a matter of pride. Guys are more outspoken. We don't like a girl to be more outspoken." said Tian, who hopes to become an engineer.

eStee Thinks: Darling Tian, if you want a girl who talks less than u, then go marry a Barbie Doll k?

Kamal Prakash, who hopes to be a lecturer in mathematics, gave voice to what appears to be the common theme here, both among young people and their elders.

"I am not interested now in love relations because I want to continue my studies. If I concentrate on love relations, I won't be able to concentrate on my studies."

eStee thinks: Every stage of your life, you'll be busy with something. After this, it'll be work. Are you going to say then that you'll wait until you retire before you start scouting? Hun, multi tasking is good practice now for the future...

Singapore's childbearing age, is one of the lowest in the world and the 28th year in a row it has stayed below the rate of 2.5 children needed to maintain the population. But even a replacement-level rate would not be enough for today's planners. The government recently announced that it was aiming to increase the population by 40 percent over the next half century, to 6.5 million from the current 4.5 million.

"Teaching our youth in school how to fall in love" is a good solution, wrote Andy Ho, a senior writer at The Straits Times, a government-friendly newspaper that does its best to help out in Singapore's many campaigns.

In 1991, for example, when the government began

1) offering cash bonuses to couples with more than two children

2) Newspaper printed tips for having sex in the back seat of a car

3) Directions to some of the "darkest, most secluded and most romantic spots" for parking. It suggested covering the windows with newspapers for privacy.

Singapore is known for its campaigns to get residents to be polite, to smile, to be tidy, to speak proper English and not to chew gum. In 1984, the country's master planner, then-Prime Minister Lee Kuan Yew, declared that too few of the country's most eligible women - the ones with college degrees - were marrying and having children.

But in Singapore it is impossible to get very far from thoughts of money and the workplace. These guys may have other things on their minds besides romance and babies. :( Thanks to International Tribune for article..

Any bright ideas to help Singaporeans MATE?

Why Men ALWAYS win in the DATING game

According to the statistics, men get better with age... I actually do agree with this... Your dating pool actually GROWS until middle age! An 18 yr old's dating range is 18-22, whereas a 30 yr old's might be 22-46.

There you have it. We, women, sour with age, like curdled milk! :(

I apologize to the women if that was a bit hate to swallow, have some laughs, on the house!

No one wants some one so choosy they require a special chef to cook their every meal, and needs a waiter with a thick wad of paper to take down their order... even if you are an anaphylaxic, you aren't a a prince/princess! ... but do bring you epipen along everywhere! Dying on your date isn't sexy... and definitely won't guarantee you a second date...