10 WRONG reasons to GET MARRIED


I'd rather be stabbed in my eye with a 5 foot pole than get married at 24!!!!

@#$%^& I find 5 of my gfs getting married this year. All of them are 24. That freaks me out! It scares the shit out of me. 24 is the year of freedom, the year of self celebration! I question myself if its the "sour graped" me speaking and I guess, maybe I'm being very close minded. *knock knock* Just because I can't imagine myself walking down the aisle with my father "relieving" himself of his duty to take care of (and feed me), doesn't mean my friends haven't reached that mental maturity....

Here I dispense top 10 reasons you should not use to get married

1) All my friends are getting married, it must be my cue...
Wake up your idea, girlfriend! Who cares if your friends are getting married!??! This is a once in a lifetime thing, so if you haven't found that special someone, don't rush.... as Phua Chu Kang says it best, DON'T PWAY PWAY!!!!

2) I better get married before my and my bf's income exceeds $8K (cannot ballot for HDB flat anymore!!!!!)
Honey, if you marry the wrong person, the procedures for signing the divorce/annulment papers will set you back a couple of wedding rings.

3) I want to live away from my parents.
Yeap, living away from your parents and "feeding" yourself probably means, welcome to your new life of lifelong mortgages and an unending stream of debts (think weter, electricity, car, furniture installments).

Yes, THINK AGAIN. Do you really wanna get weaned off your parents???

4) If I tie my bf down then he won't cheat on me anymore (if he already is or has not yet)
Girls, men don't change after marriage. If they do, it's NEVER for the better. Shackling them down means shackling yourself down. Why settle?

5) Doesn't matter if divorce, I get 50% anyway
Yeah, just that if you do get divorced, the chances of you finding another man that's eligible and willing to overlook that is 50% also.... (not saying that all divorced women are bad, depends on situations right?)

6) I can have parental consent for "premarital sex"
Yeap, you've just signed your own consent form to being the lifelong "slave" of a testosterone molecule oozing of ego. Yeap, you also have consented to, like I said paying all your bills yourself, washing your husband's underwear, washing the house, washing the floor, ironing a mountain of clothes, cooking dinner and meals for 2 people.

7) No more excuse or disapproval to stay overnight at his place
R you dumb or R u dumb? Would you give up 2 houses for 1?

8) Sounds fun! Never tried it before! I'm adventurous! Plus it come with a free diamond ring!!!
Yup, if you like adventure so much, go live in the Alcatraz. Free diamond ring? More like your payment to sell yourself to slavery.

9) I can be a tai tai and talk cock sing, song and play mahjong all day long!
Wat to talk cock? Go find the ah peks at the coffeeshop, wanna play mahjong, come find me, want to sing song ... go Kbox can? More worth it...

Life AFTER marriage?

10) I want a baby as a pet!
I'm sure you do. I mean all you have to do for this new pet is wake up every 2 hours to let him nibble on your tits, wipe it's shit filled stinky ass and burp spoilt milk in your face. Y not?

Anyways, the above was said in jest, nothing meant to demean the married or make fun at the soon to be wed. Apologize if I offend anyone... just something I thought would give singles a pretty good laugh....


32 comments:

3POINT8 said...

ballot for HDB flat?
er...ok. didn't knew the residents of the world has turned materialistic till that level

eStee said...

yea u didn't know... if ur dual income increases beyond 8k, you can buy find only off the market... cannot buy directly from govt!

Boss Stewie said...

but but but.. all my friends are getting married.. it must be my cue

eStee said...

ok tim, ill make sure ming wrap big big ang pao for u! :)

AverRal said...

That is so ridiculous

I had a good laugh about it.

Todd said...

GG you need to join your friends and be more patriotic! Don't you know that the birth rate is sinking and your city-state is going to get overrun with foreigners... so instead of focusing on 'freedom' and 'self celebration' (SM Lee would not approve!) you need to be 100% focused on how many mini-GGs you can pop out before its too late. ;)

Todd said...

Doh! Just realised it's MM Lee... hard to keep up sometimes!

Happydays-shop said...

ah?
thanks god, my marriage reason is none of the above.
lol

Geek @ Kedai.TV said...

Sometimes..marriage has it's ups and downs too...

Mom+Dad has to do same share


azrin

Jason Ho said...

hmm..mine is the other side...people are wondering why the heck am I not married since I will be 32 this year..and all I tell them is to relak..

You should enjoy your youth while you still have it man..play play play ;)

eStee said...

todd: haha little geek goddesses are alright.. what im afraid of is geek princes! Those are a handful!! You would know soon right?

eStee said...

happy days shop: good for you! good luck then!!

Azrin: Yea my parents do have a happy marriage. You know how my father proposed? "Want to buy a flat together?" -- think thats how they did it in the past!

jason: yeap, singles have fun too ok!!! :) I can attest to not being married and having a ton of fun!

pamsong said...

HAHA. Simply hilarious. And yes, it seems to be the trend these days. To get married and settle down young. I guess there are pros and cons lah.

But... in Singapore, the girls would have to get married to guys a lot older than them, right? Cos at 24, most Sg guys just graduated or are still studying, no?

brian koh said...

guess you're not settling down anytime soon -) hahaha

good perspective, all the more for us to enjoy singlehood really -)

Esther Chin said...

i wanna play majong! i come find you k?

eStee said...

pam song: :) actually guys are getting married young too! And by young I mean like 24-27... that's young right?

Brian: we're on the same page!

esther: I just learnt from ming's mother how to play mahjong... itchy to practice..!!!! :) r u like super good?

TY said...

Maybe once you start working for a little while and find you're ready to leave the nest, you'd think about it.

My turn is in a year or two, if all goes well. Cheers.

eStee said...

ty: good luck in finding happiness, no matter what shape or form it may take!

TY said...

Same to ya. And yeah..24 is kinda young to go get hitched and have kids here *muse*.

eStee said...

I guess either we all getting too frisky, or too fertile, or just dunno how to use a protection?!!?

dawnie said...

hahahahahha

I can sort of understand how you feel but yet at the same time, I suppose if I had met someone a few years ago i.e. when I was in JC or in Uni, now would actually be a good time to get married.

*sigh*

luckily for me, my brother is getting married so no need to count on me to produce grandchildren...

more luckily for me, my dad tells me that i still have plenty of time (at least 4 years) before I need to start worrying...guess he doesn't want to lose his little princess just yet...

eStee said...

dawnie: I dont want to lose you to anyone just yet too!

TY said...

man...with regards to having kids

*starts praying hard his sis would get hitched off and do the deed instead*

eStee said...

ty: haha do u love or hate ur sis?

brew27 said...

Anyone who wants to get married and is unsure can contact me!! I'll be happy to set you straight...


... Estee, did you see the ring I gave my new fiancee? :)

eStee said...

brew27: RING??? where? show me!!!

TY said...

My sis? Well.....love hate thing going on. She's a babe and I'm a dork, so there LOL.

brew27 said...

There is a picture of the ring in this blog entry:
http://www.inthekitchenwithdad.com/portal/recipes/Home/tabid/331/EntryID/24/Default.aspx

Anonymous said...

www.beforeandaftermarriage.com

The naked truth about marriage :-)

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